Today I'm guest posting over at onethousandforone.com on my experience having (and using!) our support system after adoption. It's my hope that as I share my experience, other soon-to-be adoptive families will find ways to make the most of the blessings their own communities have to offer. Please share with your soon-to-be adoptive parent friends!
|Driving away from the orphanage; a family forever.|
When my husband John and I brought our two-year-old son home from Moscow last fall, we used a post-adoption bonding practice that is sometimes called “cocooning.” Cocooning means that, for a period of time, the new adoptive family keeps their world very small (house, yard, park, minimal outside events like doctor visit or grocery trips) and the adoptive parents are the only ones to meet their new child’s needs (feeding, bathing, putting him/her to bed, providing snuggles and comfort). The idea is that the cocoon will intensify the bonding and attachment between parent and child and start the process of healing the injury that occurred when the child was relinquished from his or her former family or caregivers. The length of the cocooning period varies, but a general rule of thumb is one month for every year that the child received sub-standard care. Our son was 28 months when he came home, so we cocooned for 2 ½ months and then slowly introduced him to a bigger world.
Our experience cocooning with our son was a very positive one, and today I recommend the practice wholeheartedly. While this intense attachment phase comes with many blessings and joyous moments, it can also be exhausting and isolating for the adoptive parents. It is important for the parents to have a support system in place during this intense season. Based on my experience as an adoptive mother, here are the most important people in your support system and ways they can help your family while you cocoon. ....follow me over to onethousandforone.com to read more!